Fit For A Goddess

Trying on clothing can be a hellish experience for many women.  Our bodies morph with our experiences and flow from cycle to cycle with astounding fluidity.  While shopping with friends this morning, I was trying on all sorts of things off the rack and nothing fit!  I tried many different sizes and shapes, playing with the styles and different fabrics.

What struck me was the voice I began to hear in my head that my body wasn’t small enough here or large enough there, that I was between sizes and therefore my body was wrong.  Having decades of empowerment work and a coaching background behind me, I immediately switched to finding my body right.  This is a move that has taken me years and still requires work because the media feeds off of pointing out to us what’s not right with us to sell us more stuff.

This morning, I decided that all women in earshot of me might benefit from my internal dialogue.  So I stated aloud things like, “Not many things are fitting me here, and so I have no other choice than to determine that whomever designed them is not very well versed in adorning a Goddess.”  I could see a woman across the store looking down whose lips began to curve in a quiet smile.

I followed with, “My body is so stunningly unique that I see I will need to hire someone to create more appropriate designs that flatter the curves I’ve been so blessed with.”  For a little spice, I added, “I’m so disappointed in the lack of creativity I am finding here.  Clearly whomever created this clothing has only one body shape in mind.”

I could go on, but you get the idea.  When you face racks of clothing that hurt, bind, don’t drape well, are too loose or tight across the bust or derriere, what do you tell yourself?  I think that if we stopped blaming our bodies and began to expect more from designers, we’d find it easier to love our bodies and we’d also see a shift in what was offered.  Let’s stop tolerating second best, and instead celebrate the vast variety of body shapes that we are blessed with as women.

12 Responses to “Fit For A Goddess”

  1. gypsypriestess Says:

    i love this post, Oceana. I seldom find clothing off the rack that fits and flatters my lush curves. I am empowered to begin having my clothing created especially for me, in the fabrics and styles that I adore, instead of ‘making do’ or thinking something is wrong with my body. Thank you for sharing this. You rock, sistar.


  2. Renee Sullivan Says:

    You are so creative with your words to help us realize that we are all unique and we should all view our bodies that way. I have been thinking most of my life that clothing designers need to tailor to us rather than us to them. I’ve been short all my life and have suffered through clothing shopping for too many years. It got to the point that my friends wouldn’t go shopping with me any more because of the frustration I’d have trying to find something that fits.

    I’m at the point now that shopping for myself is almost non-existent. Unless I win the lottery and can hire a personal clothing maker, I’d rather not waste my time shopping for things that won’t fit.

    At least I’ve learned not to blame myself and I do love my body, especially since I transformed it into a healthy one 4 years ago.

    Thank you for this loving post.


    • Oceana Says:

      Thank you, Renee! It’s a shame when anyone ends up feeling less than because mass manufacturers don’t have a clue. I think a line of clothing that is fitted in store, with fabrics that stretch and give is much needed. I’m like you…I have yet to find a store that combines the style with the fit that I desire.


  3. Arianna Grindrod Says:

    LOVE!!!! I have said in clothing stores so many times – “I need a Just for me line”.


  4. Deborah Miles Says:

    Well I am not so crazy about the clothes out there today, but I am trying to take care of myself by going to the gym. I like lifting weights and plan on loosing 20 lbs. I felt better all over and less problems with my lower back. I put the weight on from lack of exercise, not bad eating, I’m a clean eater. So, I plan on taking it off and build my core at the same time. Loved your article and yes those designers keep making them smaller, don’t they.


  5. Monique Love Boucher Says:

    Can you go shopping with me? My goodness! I need to have an audio recording of your coaching words next time. I dread- I mean detest and am fearful of- going clothes shopping. It often feels like a forced self- abuse because of everything you cited with regards to the media’s influence, my own internal dialogue, etc. Fantastic blog about this experience- I love this. And you, by the way. 🙂


    • Oceanaana Says:

      That’s a great idea, Monique! I could actually create a podcast recording for women to listen to while shopping that reminds them to only choose clothes that turn them on and light them up. There could be subliminal ‘feel good about your body’ programming going on in the background. I think you’re on to something!
      Meanwhile, deep feminine self love is the foundation for knowing this in one’s core all the time, and it’s the work I do with women in my workshops and coaching programs, as you know.
      Thanks for your fabulous transparent response. I think you clearly stated what so many women feel!


  6. Gladys Parker Says:

    So true, I love it! Great post, Thanks for sharing!


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