Archive for the ‘red tent’ Category

Pleasured

February 18, 2016

bubble-bath

Do you make time for pleasure in your life?

Recently I ran a short, five day challenge for women to immerse themselves in various kinds of pleasure.  It’s strange to think that simply generating some pleasurable activities in one’s life could be such a big undertaking, wrought with resistance and avoidance.

Five straight days is more than most people can muster up a daily act of pleasure. To my surprise, about fifteen women out of almost a hundred really went for it and reported their exuberant findings as well as their struggles with it.  I didn’t expect so many heartfelt, transparent, gorgeous descriptions of what they were facing, and was so impressed.

I’ve been practicing pleasure, studying about pleasure, and teaching pleasure in various forms over the years, and what I’ve come to learn is that our culture simply does not value it.  This fact alone can stop some women cold.  Some of the struggles in the pleasure challenge were feeling guilty, too busy serving others, and difficulty finding time alone to do something pleasurable in their hectic days.

A very few participants were already practicing infusing pleasure into their lives as a way to heal and nurture themselves. Women were sharing all of the ways they found pleasure in life, ways they created more, and desires for even more.  It was such a gorgeous thing to see women sharing and learning something so simple, yet so powerful.

There were deep realizations about how focusing on pleasure brought so much awareness of even more pleasure they’d never noticed.  Vibrancy, deserving, worth, and even profound joy unfolded.  New ideas, enthusiasm and even recipes for pleasure were shared.

I have no intention of closing this amazing group.  With women joining daily, asking me what it is and how they can participate,  we’ll continue to focus on pleasure.  We’ll encourage each other to keep up the important work of enjoying life, honoring our bodies, reveling in our femininity, and opening to receiving more abundance. I’m convinced that the gateway of gratitude is primed by pleasure.

~Goddess Oceana

How can you join the Goddess Pleasure Challenge group?  Follow this LINK and ask to join.

Sensual Empowerment Goddess | Tantric Yogini | Shamaness Unlock the 7 Goddess Secrets every woman NEEDS

 

 

Speechless During Sex?

January 18, 2016

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Let’s get down to business, shall we?

Your pleasure plays a huge role in how empowered you are.  My mission is to teach you how to be a goddess, and goddesses are powerful.  One of the myriad teachings I share is how to live a pleasure-filled life, bask in sensuality, and enjoy the incredible benefits that come from such a badass lifestyle.

Before I became an empowered goddess, I was a shy, mute, lovely and good girl.  Unskilled and inexperienced sexually, I naively hoped for the best and mostly got the worst.  In those days, the only information available was in the few books we could find on the subject, magazines, and word of mouth.  All of it was sadly lacking, and we were hugely misinformed.

A big part of my awakening sexually happened when I discovered vibrators.  It changed my life.  Suddenly I was feeling things I hadn’t known I could feel.  In short, self pleasure became the key to understanding my body and in showing my lover what worked for me.  Years later, I became a sex educator for a well-known toy consultancy, and one of the themes we found most beneficial for women was teaching them that self pleasure is the key, in fact, to all women’s success in having optimal pleasure with lovers.

Many types of empowerment and sexuality trainings  later, what emerged was another aha… the absolute necessity of certain types of communication in bed.  Yes, we hear it and read it everywhere, but I have an idea that not everyone actually practices it.  Nor do they know how.

Here are a couple of tips on successful pleasuring communication:

  • Practice speaking up every time something feels good with describing exactly when and what, even if you don’t feel confident in doing so at first.  (Practice, practice, practice).
  • If something is not to your liking, instead of just laying a complaint on your partner, keep the passion flowing by first saying what did feel good or what you do like about them or what they’re doing, and follow with requesting what you want more of or  want different.
  • Keep breathing.  Holding your breath (which many do unconsciously when they’re revved up) constricts energy, inhibits communication, and freezes the response.  Just remember to breathe, and if you notice you stopped, start again with slower, longer breaths.  Short, shallow breath can also shorten orgasm.  Long, conscious breathing prolongs pleasure. Breathing can also be a way of communicating.  Even if we don’t realize it, we sense so much from another’s breathing patterns.
  • If all else fails, ask your lover to receive, and show them what you like by touching them they way you wish to be touched, kissed, or stroked.

Speaking up in bed can be so scary for some women, especially if past abuse or trauma is present.  Be gentle with yourself and start slowly, and celebrate every successful communication, no matter how small it may seem.  One tiny step at a time, over time, will reap huge rewards, I promise.

Juicy Goddess Blessings,

Goddess Oceana

Sensual Empowerment Goddess | Tantric Yogini | Shamaness Unlock the 7 Goddess Secrets every woman NEEDS

 

Be A Goddessly Intender

December 7, 2015

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People ask me what living like a goddess looks like. There’s no simple answer. It can be the smallest, most subtle change in an intention that makes all the difference in the world.

When I mentor women into bringing out their inner goddess, living life like a goddess, and being an embodied goddess, we practice many tools over time until they become second nature. One of these tools is the power of intention.

It’s a shift of mind that can completely alchemize any situation, turn the tide on the outcome of the day, and even make a meal an absolutely healing experience.

Working with intention is one of the most powerful spiritual moves we have as human beings.

Intention is a silent form of mental focus that imprints the invisible field of creation with a recipe for manifestation of whatever we desire.

What that means simply, is that when we focus a clearly articulated idea of what we want, it sends waves of information out into the quantum field of energy we’re a part of, and that energy has the sole purpose of following information waves.

Setting an intention is potent magic, the kind that a goddess can easily use to create wonderful things.

Next time you’re focused on someone and wondering what you can do to elicit something good, set an intention to focus on the good things you see about them rather than the negative. What we focus on grows, and intention can ramp that up tremendously.

Go ahead and grant someone their humanity today by giving them the benefit of the doubt. Find something to love about them. Doubt that their intentions are bad.

Assume their intentions are good.

See what happens.

 

Let me know how it goes. I love hearing from you!

 

Blissings and Blessings,

Goddess Oceana

Sensual Empowerment Goddess | Tantric Yogini | Shamaness Unlock the 7 Goddess Secrets every woman NEEDS

 

Are You Too Much, Not Enough, Or Just Plain Confused?

June 30, 2015

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Do you shrink yourself to be more pleasing?

Do you go blank when someone asks you what you want, or make something up in hopes it will turn out well?

Are you confused about why men don’t seem attracted to you, or do you miss the signals?

You’re not alone, sister.  So many of us are stymied by the crazy mixed messages we are bombarded with from the media, and even more importantly, by the way we’ve been trained to be silent, appeasing, and people pleasing.  It becomes a habit based in fear and self-preservation.

You don’t need this habit, but wow does it take hold when it’s reinforced by attitudes in the culture, commercials, and good old-fashioned female oppression.

The truth is that you are never too much, you’re always enough, and you know way more than you give yourself credit for, you goddess!  But how are you supposed to tap into this type of confidence, courage and savvy?

This is my specialty, and I have been through it for decades until I figured it out.  I was the ultimate people pleaser, good girl, quiet and polite lady who spent a whole lot of time battling depression, failed relationships, a failed marriage, and even abuse and rape.

My journey to wholeness began  very slowly, years before I realized I had a problem.  I was training in Law of Attraction and spiritual mysticism early on in my teens, and started my passion for attending transformational workshops in my twenties.  But it wasn’t enough to wipe out the low self-worth I was battling.  Brilliant teachings and trainings were wonderful, and I benefitted immensely, but they didn’t change the deepest core of my particular emotional and mental wounding.

The process of healing took me three decades and was a relentless search on my part, healing layer after layer after layer.  I went through what I would call a spiritual death in my early forties, and the journey back from that was through my ongoing intensive training in the Divine Feminine mysteries, wisewoman teachings, shamanic trainings, and decades of practicing tantric yoga.

I believe there is a reason for everything we experience, and that the soul is imbued with a Divine Plan in collaboration with our inherent desires for ecstasy.

What I offer you now as an elder is the full scope of all that I’ve learned and practiced over my lifetime.  One method doesn’t work for everyone, as you are a unique and wondrous creature with a path as intricate and distinct as a snowflake.  Every individual has their own story to be lived and liberated into an enlightened legend, and for most of us, the support and guidance of a wise teacher with many experiences and an array of skills is necessary.

My passion is to dive deep with women and peer into their souls, support them to fulfill their Divine Destiny with joy, love, and sensuality as their inherent birthright.

Blissings & Blessings,

Goddess Oceana

Goddess Oceana is a certified Tantric Yoga Teacher, Shaman, and Women’s Empowerment Coach. If you’re a woman who wants to embrace your inner power to attract and create more money, and become a magnet to more positive relationships, go here for the free series, The Seven Goddess Secrets Every Modern Woman Must Know To Live In Passionate Pleasure now.

 

Do Shame Differently

June 19, 2014

I love to recycle the shameful and humiliating experiences in my life in ways that celebrate the fullness of the ways they enrich my expansion.  For instance, recently I held an event where no one showed up.  I spent two hours preparing the space and the materials, countless hours marketing and working on the site, social media, and emailing, etc.

What’s a goddess to do when this happens?  I chose to bask in the gorgeous space I created, eat the chocolates I brought, dance to the fabulous playlist I created, and make a sensual dance video while looking out at the lake.

 

Fully prepared tantric yoga circle for doing shame differently.

Fully prepared tantric yoga circle for doing shame differently.

This shifts the focus from victimization to sourcing and from resistance to flow.  It’s also called “riding the horse in the direction it’s going”, according to Werner Erhard, founder of est.

Engaging the flow, allowing the emotions to move through and surrendering to them, we find ourselves unleashed, less somatically blocked, and more fully alive.  It’s a good thing.  Tears can come and they’re well received.  We are gentle with ourselves and can find the ecstasy in the mundane.

Very soon I am creating an event where I will celebrate the people who have dumped me for their perfect self-exorcism, and release the crappy energy they left behind, bury the loss and humiliation in a funeral pyre, and make the very most out of my black wardrobe.  It will be a funeral for shame.  Cuz that’s the way I roll. 😉

~Goddess Oceana

www.GoddessOceana.com

Balance Is Absurd

January 23, 2014

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The almighty experts who are trying to figure out how women can have it all tell us that above all, we must strive for balance.  Better yet, draw a pie graph and label each slice with a different area of your life and give each slice a number from one to ten.  Then work harder on the low numbers.  I have news for these experts, girlfriend.  The people who create these graph exercises are missing the fact that for each woman there are many, many levels of pies all stacked up, some thrown and some eaten.  A woman can eat a pie and bake another one that matches it and no one will ever be the wiser.  It’s just not so simple.  After years of following expert advice like a good girl, why am I coming up facing the same struggle and beating myself up on top of it?  I’ve given this some thought, done some intensive research, and am realizing there are a few things I have to say on the matter.

First of all, a woman striving for balance is like a cloud trying to maintain precipitation without ever raining.  Women are not linear beings going from point A to point B in one straight, even, carefully drawn line.  The women I know are messy, neat, beautiful, disheveled, passionate, irritable, sweet, generous, terrified, confident, completely neurotic, powerful, sexy, intimidated, anxious, boring, exciting, insecure, happy, depressed, on fire, and so very much more.  In fact, every single one of these adjectives could describe one single woman at any given time.  The women I have experienced who seem to have their lives in perfect balance on the outside are often lacking a certain internal fire, a spark in their eyes, or are medicated unduly by unwitting professionals trying to treat a label rather than dig deeper.  Just sayin.  I’m personally convinced that balance is something water finds, scales measure, and construction workers who aren’t in a messy hurry find with a level.

The single thing that has lit me up and given me a sense of ownership and creative power in my life has been pleasure as a practice, combined with an internal experience of the sacredness of all of life, wrapped up in the love of other women.  There’s a certain knowing that goes womb-deep that women hold for each other, unspoken, palpable, and in a silent language “bone”.  It’s something we just know in our bones, as ancient as our ancestral line.  Just as men have a language, women have a sisterhood that we need around us to survive well and to take the dives into the mystery that only women sense.  It’s wrapped up in shadows and pleasure, passionate creativity, loss and grieving, and seduction mixed with rolling laughter.  For us to find our center, we truly do need the love and support of other women.

The experts have the right idea you know, that there’s something we need to steer ourselves towards our joyful fulfillment in this life, but it’s not a perfectly balanced pie.  It’s more of a sacred agreement to honor our core knowing, and to do it much as we have been taught by our bodies, in messy, loud colors and soft hues of rising and reposing cycles.  We are to honor, cherish, and nurture pleasure in utter defiance of a culture that repudiates it.  I’m convinced that balance takes care of itself when we are true to ourselves, and that pies are for sharing, the more the better.  We can go ahead and use the graph to lay out a plan, but if we make the graph more important than our sense of bone knowing when the body says no, we risk coming from a flat line and missing out on the sheer pleasure of being alive.  A woman knows, but a place where she can be heard tiptoeing towards her core with tears and fire is the sacred, cyclical, ever-changing map towards her true desires and her passion.  Let this be the new “balance”.

Work Out Your Love Muscle

May 20, 2013

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Friendly reminder here.  There are times when we wonder if anyone really loves us.  Ever feel that way?  We want to believe it, and yet there can be this little voice inside that tells us they really don’t.  It tells us that everyone out there has their own best interest in mind, that they’re only being nice, but when push comes to shove they’re just giving us lip service.

I’m here to tell you that getting a handle on that voice is totally an inside job.  There is absolutely nothing you can do to shut it up permanently, but you can certainly turn down the volume and add a new character.  The Self Love Queen, yes, that’s what I’m talkin’ about.

You see, if you begin practicing self-love, you start to notice it everywhere.  People respond to you differently.  Nice things happen.  You get bonus gifts from the universe and happy surprises. Dogs and babies flirt with you, and your popularity gets a major boost.

Think about it.  Why the hell would you like someone who doesn’t even like themselves?  Tough to do, right?!  Sure, you can like them a bit, pity them some, and even get your inner martyr stoked on saving them from their own self loathing, but do you really want to hang out with them much?  It’s depressing because no matter how much love you send their way, they cannot and will not soak it up.  A person who doesn’t love themselves can’t receive more love than they have their inner barometer set for.  It’s similar to water.  It seeks it’s own level.

That said, the most efficient way to love and be loved is to work out your self love muscles.  Practice doing nice things for yourself.  Force yourself to look in the mirror and deliver a genuine compliment.  If you can’t find anything right, then make it up until you can muster some belief about it.  Take some extra time caring for that precious body of yours and start feeding it some fresh, delicious food.  Drink more water.  Take a walk somewhere beautiful.

Give yourself a foot massage with some divinely scented lotion, and finally take a break and read that book you always wanted to read.  When someone gives you a compliment, just say thank you.  Mean it. Locate the place in your life where you feel short-changed and set about giving yourself more.  Whether it’s more friendship, more free time, more laughter, more sex, more gifts, more appreciation…find a way to have more until you feel filled up.  Then do it again.

The only way to receive more is to be a larger container for what you want to receive.  Start flexing those love muscles, my friend, and see what happens.  I’d love to hear about your experiences with this and how you opened your life to more love.

~Goddess Oceana

http://www.goddessoceana.com

Goddess Oceana is a certified Tantric Yoga Teacher, Shaman, and Women’s Empowerment Coach. If you’re a woman who wants to embrace your inner power to attract and create more money, and become a magnet to more positive relationships, go here for the free series, The Seven Goddess Secrets Every Modern Woman Must Know To Live In Passionate Pleasure now.

Beginner’s Guide to Falling In Love With You

April 21, 2013

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I want to really talk to you today.  I’ve been thinking so much about self-love and how women just work and please and caretake.  You know, even when I try to write some very basic tidbits on how to begin to indulge in self-care, I run into women who can’t even wrap their minds around a few minutes of self-indulgence.

Someone wrote to me the other day and she was saying she really wanted me to expand on this concept.  She said that if a woman is so deprived of self-love that she has isolated herself and never gets out, where in the world does she start?  I told her that the fastest way to begin was to eye gaze.

It sounds weird, right?!  Eye gazing.  Like, what the heck is that?  And how on earth do you do it with yourself?  It’s actually a tantric technique, and Rumi, that world renown phenomenal poet of divine love, used to become enlightened.  He spent a full year in a room with his teacher simply eye gazing.  He emerged an enlightened being and wrote poetry that to this day touches the hearts of millions.

I tell people to eye gaze because it was where I began my journey to self-love.  Thirty-some years ago I couldn’t look at my own eyes in the mirror for more than a few seconds.  It made me so uncomfortable that I literally could not bear it.  Today, I could do it endlessly, falling deeper and deeper into blissful communion with my Self.  My Self as in the Divine that lives within, the gentle creature that embodies this Self, the vulnerable sweetness of my innocence and the compassion that wells up when I really see me.

So, for today, please try to look into your own eyes, even for 60 seconds.  Allow the discomfort to rise, and see if you can stay with yourself for a few more seconds.  See the tenderness that others see when they look at you. See beyond the face and into the soul, where, if you keep up this practice daily, you will meet the Self that loves you utterly and completely.

~Oceana LeBlanc is a women’s empowerment coach, tantric yogini, and shaman

http://www.goddessoceana.com

Self Love Makes Lotsa Love Kittens

April 20, 2013

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The more we love ourselves, the more love we’re able to receive and the more love we can pour onto the world freely.  If you do the math, you’ll end up finding that self love multiplies like bunnies and kittens.

A calculator cannot add up the exponential and radical profusion of miraculous ripples of good that reverberate into the ethers and bounce back.  No miracle shelter could begin to hold the colossal volume of overflowing goodness babies that proliferate the population when a being practices self love.

Giving without expectation of reward is only possible if one has mastered self love.  One who cannot love themselves fully is tethered energetically with invisible iron cords of non-release and prosperity constipation. Gifting doesn’t happen.  What happens is unspoken bartering, gift wrapped with a bow.  The poor sucker receiving this package is now under scrutiny.

This type of sad affair causes all manner of unappreciated gifts, unfulfilled expectations, and even some outright victimization, illnesses, and swampy nose dives of despair. Among other things, it’s just tight and contracted.  Ouch.  Love can barely squeeze in and love can barely squeeze out.  Suffering ensues.

The antidote for all of this is to do the unthinkable.  Overdose with self love lubricant.  It’s what society tells us is selfish, what mama taught us good girls don’t do, and what we feel like we should be hiding. We need to overdose, because we’re sorely lacking and because when one is malnourished, drastic measures are necessary.

We need high potency self love, pleasure breaks, bubble baths, treats, hugs, massages, laughter, happy movies, snuggling and cuddles, sweet smelling stuff, dancing wild, sleeping naked on satin sheets, crying in a pair of strong and loving arms, letting someone brush our hair, lounging around doing absolutely nothing while sipping expensive liquids, or what. ever. it. takes. We need sessions of proclaiming our gratitude for every single thing we see in the mirror from a hang nail to the curve of our cheek.

People, this is an international emergency.  Self love is the red cross of getting off the cross and caring for the only one that is right here in this moment.  You.

~Oceana LeBlanc is a transformational leader, women’s empowerment coach, tantric yogini, and shaman.

http://www.goddessoceana.com

Some Good News

April 19, 2013

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I have some *good* news. You are love, lovely, loving beyond anything I could have imagined. Keep up the good work. I see you.

When the shit hits the fan, it’s you that shows up with paper towels and soap, rolling up your sleeves.  In the middle of the night, you’re there praying for the poor, lonely soul that weeps and longs.  When I fall down, you show up and help me up off my knees and ask if I’m okay.

In the midst of a life or death crisis, you blast out a call to the many in efforts to pull together and bring everything you’ve got. That time when I moved and we were so sick of eating pizza, you showed up out of nowhere with a huge pan of healthy dinner.  You even gave me the recipe.

When she was driving for seven hours alone, she passed your place and you invited her in, fed her, and opened your home with a clean place to rest her head.  As you said your goodbyes, you loaded her arms with gifts and smiles, and a great big bag of come back anytime.

That time when his best friend moved away, you stepped up without missing a beat.  You came to be my audience on my most nervous, scary first time and wrote the best review.  Someone called you crying in complete despair and you listened with so much love for a full hour until they were all better again.  You were sitting in your car the whole time but you never mentioned it.

You were one of the only ones to make time to visit him in the hospital, and you stayed longer when you realized no one else was showing up.  You stopped to pick up the trash in that public bathroom to make it nicer for the next person.  When you dished up dessert, you gave them the biggest pieces even though it was your favorite.

You were terrified, but you still went first because you knew they were terrified as well.  They said some really mean things to you, but you decided to see that it was their fear talking and responded with love.

I could go on forever, which is what’s so stunning.  There’s plenty of room here for you to fill in the blanks, my friend.  Suffice it to say that you are love, loving, and loved beyond measure.  Keep up that good work, because I so totally see you.

~Oceana Leblanc is a transformational leader, women’s empowerment coach, tantric yogini, and shaman.

http://www.goddessoceana.com


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