Posts Tagged ‘blog’

Stuck in a Rut of Depression

December 8, 2017

rut

Someone recently said to me that she wanted to “transcend the mundane” and felt she was stuck in a rut of old, unhealthy patterns and dysfunction.  I thought about times when I was stuck and how it used to play out for me, and how it plays out now that I have almost forty years of deep personal work under my belt.

There’s a very clear difference.  Thirty-eight years ago, I knew I was at cause, but didn’t have the tools or skills necessary to understand the nuances of how to pull myself out, other than affirmations and an image board, journaling, and self-blame.  Way back then, I wasn’t as clear about how to distinguish being at cause about my entire reality versus being to blame for my entire reality.

So blaming myself when I couldn’t figure out how to make things better was my recourse, and it would spiral into the most excruciating depression, hopelessness, and longing to just make the pain stop…even fantasizing about and then attempting suicide.

Somehow my will to keep learning and persevering on the path of various transformational modalities began to pay off, and I got better at finding strategies to get myself aligned again.  The greatest learning about depression for me was to own my anger, my rage, my upset, and master how to express my boundaries in a safe and grounded way.  Once I began to express my anger by making requests of others that honored my newly discovered boundaries, I stopped turning my anger towards myself.

This took time, practice, and mistakes.  I failed a lot, and then learned from the failures.  I made a little progress each time.  Life began to improve, and as I stopped making other people’s wants far more important than my needs, I became a happier person. That’s one small  example of how I overcame a debilitating rut.

The various skills I’ve learned over the years I’ve tested repeatedly, and I continue to acquire more.  Mostly, I’ve come to realize that I love to learn, and so I honor that by diving into learning whatever it is I find fascinating.  It just so happens that all of it is in the realm of spirituality, transformation, psychology, relationship, sexuality, and esoteric studies.

The ruts I see my clients stuck in most often are the ruts of people-pleasing, not keeping their word (a basic tenet for becoming more powerful is to keep your word), a habit of putting other people first and getting lost in overwhelm, and or finding an old pattern of behavior they’re stuck in and not getting the energy healing necessary to break free from it.  These are all ways in which we sabotage ourselves, especially as women.

The good news is that self-love is the super vitamin that can make all healing possible, and it improves our lives dramatically.  And so I start there, with daily practices that infuse self-love and self-worth that begin to lift a person immediately from whatever rut they’re in.  Then we get into some nitty gritty pattern shifts and healing work.

Whatever rut you’re in, begin with self-love.  You can start by telling yourself that you love you very much, each and every day.  It can be that simple.  Let that love into your heart and feel it wrap around you like a soft, warm blanket.  Do it often and out loud.

Here’s to Loving You,

Goddess Oceana

Message me to schedule a fifteen minute call to find out how to work with me to live a happier, more fulfilling life.  I help women connect deeply to their inner spiritual guidance and become the sensual, powerful goddess they were meant to be while co-creating their deepest desires with the universe.

Email me:  Oceana@GoddessOceana.com

 

 

How Do You Meet Desire?

August 31, 2017
woman at sea, milia poirier
What do you deeply desire in your life that you don’t have?
What are you willing to do to have it?
I asked the universe for something and instead of immediate delivery, I received some powerful reflections that were painful for me.
This is often the case when we say we desire something, and are calling it into our reality.
We must become a match for that thing before it can come to us. Honestly, if we’re wondering why we don’t have what we want yet, it’s almost always because we haven’t made internal or external space for it, or because we aren’t in alignment with it in some way.
I am in such gratitude today for that discomfort I felt yesterday. Rather than choose to be a victim about it, which is the status quo for many who don’t realize their own power yet, I chose to look at the message, where I was responsible, and what I could do to further align myself to that juicy manifestation I wanted so much.
I allowed the Universe to speak to me, informing me in experiences of what needed to be overhauled before I could receive my desire.
Some powerful questions for the courageous manifester:
Where am I responsible in my ways of being, doing, thinking, and talking, that generated reflections of what I did not want?
What parts of this are in my control, and how can I shift my thinking or my way of showing up in the world that will align with what I do desire?
Is this a door closing because another better fit is beckoning? If so, am I grateful for the redirection, with open heart and joyful receiving for my true desires?
Do I truly want it, or am I just kind of wanting it? How powerful is my fire for this thing, and am I willing to do whatever it takes to meet the universe with action?
Is this a pattern when I review other times when there has been a similar feeling around a situation? If so, what is that pattern, what takes place, and how am I perpetuating it? How can I change this?
These are some questions that evoke the kinds of internal changes necessary for a powerful manifestation, the internal dialogue that will make the difference between having what you want and giving up, or blaming someone else that you can’t get it.
There are many ways to manifest, and many subtleties to the art of manifestation, and many schools of thought and discipline for it.
I pull from a great variety of those schools of thought in my work with people, integrating the tools that will resonate with the personality and level of experience. It’s always a unique co-creation to support someone in realizing their desires and expanding their soul’s growth edges.
Currently, I’m thinking about ways that I can support more women to hone their manifesting skills and really BE in their power.  I can only do so many one on one, personalized sessions with women.  So how can I bring these skills to those of you who can’t work with me privately for one reason or another?
My friend told me I should coach a group of women together, and I listened.
So I’m launching a coaching group for women who want something and haven’t been able to manifest it.
I’m excited about this, and can’t wait to share more about Divine Feminine Manifestation Mojo!
Stay tuned, Goddess.  More is coming very soon…
Love, Blissings, & Goddess Blessings,
Goddess Oceana
To work with me, email me at GoddessOceana@gmail.com and we’ll set up a 15 minute discovery session to see what I offer that will best serve you.
Photo Credit: Milia Poirier

Finding God In An Unlikely Place

June 25, 2012

What’s appropriate to you may not be appropriate to me, and vice versa.  These lines seem to be fuzzy with the boon in social networking and the consequent weaving of friends with family, extended relations, business associates, international reach, and the combining of cultures, groups, subgroups along with so many other factors.

It can be difficult when one person is sincerely finding something humorous, and another is simultaneously reminded of a tragedy, and yet another is just plain grossed out.  The reactions are as varied as snowflakes, and when awareness levels of one’s own shadow territory in psychologically as of yet untraversed terrain, then we see more public arguments than helpful comments.  In one sense, it can be truly enlightening, and at other times it’s outright horrible to witness, leaving one with a bad feeling inside.

Personally, I seem to have the good fortune of having surrounded myself with a plethora of conscious communicators, peacemakers, spiritually aware beings, and overall good natured folks.  On the occasion when I stumble on a blog or a youtube video where people of other segments of our culture are more prone to leave a blatant criticism, a blatantly off color remark, or a very graphic and obscenely crude insult, I’m left temporarily stunned.

I find I don’t expect it.  At all.  Sometimes I think I must live in this bubble of kindness where nothing (that I consider) negative pervades my pink peacefulness.  Yes, of course, I get my feelings hurt and I have anger and upsets like everyone else.  But, I seem to have gathered endless resources and learnings that I can choose in any  moment to take that feeling, dig deeper into it, and learn more about myself.  I seem to have made a choice to take everything personally, as in I am at cause and everything is a reflection of the conscious state I continue to strive for.

That said, even the seemingly crude and abusive things I come across are a reflection of something inside of me.  I own it all.   I feel that if I am willing to own it and dig around in it, see where I can heal it and forgive it, I am moving a tiny bit closer to my home, the place I long for…the center heartspace of what I call God/dess.


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