Posts Tagged ‘skills’

Banish Overwhelm From Your Queendom

June 7, 2014
 
 
I was speaking with a very dear friend this morning about our strategies for simplifying our lives, being more present, and banishing overwhelm.  It was a great convo where we each had our own practices to share, and so we ended up with a synergy of amazing tools.  Naturally, I thought it would be great to share them with you.  Love it, right?!
 
So here’s the deal.  Living a life of presence as an embodied goddess doesn’t mean you’re not expanding, growing, and learning.  It means that you come from a place of grounded empowerment, and that when you waver, you have the skills handy to bring yourself back into presence again.  We’re also naturally designed  to have divergent awareness.  We’re most often multi~tasking and feeling all of our surroundings calling for our goddessly attention.  We have the deliciously expansive view.  This is a beautiful thing about us.  
 
The problem occurs when we are pulled into too much conflicting divergence with old, worn~out patterns of trying to be nice and saying yes to every request.  We don’t think to ask for support and some of us haven’t learned how to say no.  We may not know how to do a certain thing and we’re too afraid of rejection to ask anyone.  Maybe we don’t know how to articulate something in a way that allows us to delegate.   Overwhelm happens when our natural proclivity as goddesses goes from choice to pleasing mode.  Our people~pleasing servant self takes control, and the goddessly aligned self reclines on her chaise lounge and sleeps.

 
That was the explanation, but now for the nitty~gritty, “how to reign it in” skills…
 
1.  When you notice you’re feeling overwhelmed, stop.  Just STOP what you’re doing for a minute.  Close your eyes and breathe in through your nose slowly, exhaling deeply, a few times.  This calms your nervous system and gives the madness a commercial break.
 
2.  Choose the ONE task at hand that you are doing.  Slow it down and see it through to completion.   Command the others to take a back seat until you finish.
 
3.  Reframe your self~blame.  Whatever your mind is freaking out about, it can wait.  Create a new story.  If you’re running late, decide you have perfect timing and that you can only get there when you get there. (Besides, the party doesn’t ever really start until you arrive.)  If the problem is that you’ve crammed 20 tasks into a day and can’t get them all done, choose three and call it a day well done.  Determine to give yourself larger time frames from now on.
 
4.  DELEGATE.  If you can delegate even a part of your task, call someone and request a specific action that will take the load off of you.  If you’re not sure how, start with one simple task that is easy to do and easy to articulate.  Then you can begin to build on that muscle next time. You’re not superwoman, you are a goddess.  Goddesses don’t do it all themselves. They are like queens, delegating, leading the kingdom.  You rule the temple, darling goddess!
 
5.  Start a spiritual practice a few minutes a day.  Make a promise to yourself.  Tiny, little disciplines really do build on themselves, and every drop matters. Don’t wait until you have one hour a day, or the perfect expanse of time.  Just.  Do. Something.  Mindful breathing, a beautiful prayer, one yoga pose, light a candle…you get the idea.  Anything done with applied, positive intention is a goddessly act of spiritual devotion.  Connecting with your spiritual center is the first breakthrough to alignment.
 
Over time, these habits will become second nature and overwhelm will occur less and less.  I know you can do it!
 
Would love to hear how these land for you, what works, and if you have any reports from the field.
 
~Goddess Oceana
 
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Are You Giving it Away and Ignoring Your Fabulosity?

July 11, 2012

Away for a long weekend and catching up after five days without blogging….oh my.  This morning I had a major epiphany.  Not a small one, mind you, but a big, huge, fat one.  My beloved and I share our morning cuppa over a daily inspirational reading and a few minutes of prayer and meditation to give our day a combined crystal launching off.

This morning was a bit different.  We started having this amazing conversation that is similar to many we’ve had over the past 20-something years about his business, his current challenges and wins, and the extraordinary day to day occurrences of being the CEO of a startup company that’s been chosen in the top hundred of worldwide startups for mentorship with the most elite investors on the east coast.  The conversation usually starts with interesting minutia, often leads into a challenge or query, and almost always ends with big smiles, clarity, enthusiasm, and a renewed sense of accomplishment and moving to the next phase.

As a spiritual business coach to many women embarking on opening their own businesses or shifting gears towards ramping up their businesses, this type of conversation comes easily to me.  It’s like breathing, making a sandwich, and finding a new ingredient when the preferred one isn’t available.  I love what I do and am so darn good at it that like many people who are gifted in a certain area of expertise, I take it for granted.

This morning, however, a light went on.  I realized that what comes to me so naturally is not necessarily that easy for someone else.  It dawned on me that I have been coaching my beloved for decades and that he is not female, holistic, or embarking on his own one person service venture like my clients.  He’s been corporate for years, has employees, gives high level presentations, has been a consultant to firms seeking to overhaul the very foundations of how they approach large projects, and is an ambitious, goal oriented, driven, suit wearing, briefcase carrying, highly intelligent male.  (He’s hot, too.)  What dawned on my marble head this morning was that I am a highly skilled leadership coach for men and women who are on the cutting edge of worldwide paradigm busting entrepreneurial ventures.  What sets me apart from the typical leadership coach is an incredible thirty years of training in various spiritual and energetic modalities that shift and transform blocks and patterns that keep people stuck, catapulting them into the success they desire, thereby saving them from years of frustration and failure.  Whoa, right?!

What are your gifts, and what have you been hiding from yourself in order to stay small and comfy?  What comes so naturally to you that you don’t even consider it a skill?  Who have you been helping in your life in ways that you don’t acknowledge?  Where in your life are people thriving and so much better due to a little something you gave them that was almost effortless on your part, or even really, really fun?

Goddess Oceana

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