Posts Tagged ‘rest’

Menopause For The Clueless Like Me

June 30, 2012

Had to chime in on this one, gals.  If you look at the symptoms of menopause and bipolar disorder side by side, they are almost identical.  I was having memory loss, and tremendous mood swings two years ago.  First, I started seeing a therapist, thinking I was losing it.  After a few months, he confirmed that I was not in fact, mentally ill, but suggested I strive to slow down with the flood of topics I talked about in conversation because he felt I was a genius and that it might help people to catch up.  Thanks for the compliment, but now what?  He hadn’t helped me figure out the scourge of symptoms With which I’d had been afflicted.  (My conversations improved dramatically, however).

Upon seeing my gynecologist, I was relieved in a way to find out that I was in menopause, and received some excellent information about how to cope.  My gyno is a much older guy, and uses his well hidden intuition along with a stunning history of good medicine.  I love him because he isn’t afraid to tell me to use black cohosh for hot flashes, and he was the first doctor who didn’t have to look up a rare autoimmune issue I have when I became a new patient.  This is a rare find these days, so I’m keeping him.

Perimenopause leading into menopause is a process that can take ten years to traverse and possibly more.  I know, I was stunned when I first learned this tidbit.  It’s unreal, yes?  There are so many symptoms, and challenges that women have that they don’t realize are menopause related.  Facilitating a red tent for the last five years, I’ve learned a lot about this and encounter many women who are experiencing these things, some more than others, and some great insights into the various ways that women cope.

One of the things that’s helped me come to terms with menopause is slowing down a bit.  I haven’t been overloading my schedule as much and I’ve learned to take time out for myself.  Sleep is crucial, and yet I find myself up at 3 a.m., wide awake.  It can be maddening.  I’ve begun to make the best of it and embrace that time as my quiet time to catch up on a book, some writing, or take time to meditate.  It’s the perfect hushed atmosphere in which to contemplate and make peace with my past, and consider what’s next.

Some women recommend a year of going inward.  In our hectic lives with kids and careers, we don’t always have that prerogative, but in place of that we can take small self care breaks.  I wrote a whole article about this on my blog, inspired by something written by Clarissa Pinkola Estes about women and our bone deep need for recharging our souls.  Taking a year of solitude was an ancient practice.  I sure wish I had the luxury of going to a cabin by myself, turning inward and making peace with my life now that I’m 52 and the shift towards elder is taking place inside of me.  Meanwhile, since it’s not an option, I am finding bits of time to be alone, and as a homeschooling mom, this is quite a feat.

 What can we do to navigate this completely messy, unpredictable, confusingly unforewarned time of our lives?  Walking is good for us, taking high quality supplements, herbal and homeopathic remedies, rescue remedy for stressful situations, whatever stress relieving practices work for you…cutting out too much caffeine, times of solitude, and especially keeping a small notepad for notes.  A very dear friend almost a year ahead of me advised me to write everything down.  Everything.  Words disappear even as they are making their way to my tongue.  They mysteriously interchange, and sometimes I sound like I’m on a psychedelic drug trip as my memory, my intuition, and my inner work collide outwardly in a sentence that no one understands but me.  In fact, we are on a trip of huge proportions…a journey into holding our power as wiser elders, a pregnancy of a lifetime of wisdom giving birth to itself.  Menopause is the time to begin to learn to honor this body journey for real or else.

In Crones Don’t Whine, Jean Shinoda Bolen writes “Crones trust what they know in their bones.” They don’t bend the truth to please others, and they are far less influenced by the opinions of others than they were when young.”  This is common knowledge to many women my age.  With the onset of hormonal flux and deep transformation, we have little patience left for giving away the precious moments of our time left on earth.  Mortality kicks us in the teeth in the wee hours as some of us experience waking from sleep in full blown, bodily panic attacks.  We are slowly  shifting towards resting on the bleachers to watch with a wry smile as the younger crowd goes about their dramatic learnings.  We have some darn good wisdom when they come sauntering over, sweaty and exhausted, inquisitive, sometimes wounded and finally willing to listen.  The demands of those intent on swaying us into the next new thing, or giving us ultimatums on what they deem time-sensitive decisions is easily brushed off like a gnat as we solidly plant ourselves in our own good timing.

The conversations that show up in our faces when we’d rather be enjoying the scenery are more easily met with a simple, direct, honest request for some quiet.  We inadvertently offend those who don’t honor our truth, and in doing so we don’t waste time feeling guilty.  We’re glad to have weeded out who can stand in the face of our power and love us there.  After all, the ones left standing are the ones who will actually show up to lend a hand when we’re too decrepit to carry our own groceries someday soon enough.

Goddess Oceana

http://www.goddessoceana.com

http://www.menopausegoddessblog.com/

http://www.alisastarkweather.com

http://susunweed.com/

Women Who Run With The Wolves

Wisdom of Menopause

Five Simple Steps to Your Soul Recharge

June 23, 2012

Lilies

My clients are all feeling it, I am feeling it, and I suspect you are feeling it.  Time seems to be moving like a rocket ship, and we’re hanging on for dear life, full to busting at the seams with stuff to do, messages to answer, phones ringing, loved ones needing us, catching up, catching up…

When the pace is out of control, there is always a small voice under the din, calling us to come home.  In our current global paradigm shift, we are feeling a higher vibration energy and it is an intense feeling to adjust to.  The answer is to connect to our Source, to align with what nurtures and replenishes us and to plug into a circuit bigger than all that we think we are.

Clarissa Pinkola Estes is a master at knowing what feeds the soul, and her wisdom is timeless.  She urges us to find time to go back to Soul. Soul is where we rest, where we boundary off our personal space, where we don’t do, but rather BE.  Women are especially wise to utilize this advice.  It takes courage and unwavering intention, this going home to our souls.  It can be small breaks of time when we do something that feeds us, such as playing music, doing yoga, meditating, or taking a walk alone.  Spending time connecting to the earth is especially beneficial and aligning.  Some of us need larger spaces of time and solitude to recharge, especially if we are ultra sensitive.

During the winter months when we are having snow storms and freezing cold, Nature beckons us to go inward.  Soul time is necessary to re-pose, review, take stock, discard, reinvent, vision, dream, nourish, and wait patiently for the seeds of what is to come to surface.  When we are surging forth with new and fresh ideas, clamoring to bring our good work into the sunshine in spring and summer, we also need to be mindful of the small breaks that refuel our bodies and souls.  Fighting our natural cycle takes a toll on our vital life force.  From experience, I can tell you that you can indeed take the time you need to rest.  Our minds will tell us different stories, but they are all illusions of attachment, I assure you.

The Five Steps

1 ~ Breathe deep and slow, relaxing your body and settling into the NOW.

2 ~ Allow the idea of new possibilities, letting go of the mind chatter that tells you that time for rest is impossible because of___________________.  Simply replace that thought with the willingness to be open to possibility.

3 ~ Choose a time on your calendar.  Block it out and claim is as sacred.  Intend to keep your promise to yourself.

4 ~ Ask your loved ones to support you in this, and explain that you need this and that you promise to come back, to return to them with even more love and energy as the rejuvenated you.

5 ~ DO IT.  Take the time, do whatever gives your spirit great rest and nurturing, connecting you to your gorgeous, divine Soul.

 

Saying YES to your exquisite self care is the first step to living into your bliss, my friends.  Thank you for caring  for yourself with compassion, because the waves of love emanate out into this world and make the world a much, much more beautiful place to share.
Blissings & Blessings~
Oceana

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